25th Sept Fri: Dryer and trelis

The dryer arrived, there it is, fairly simple stuff. We have a condensing dryer equipped washing machine, which was mighty pricey, but never use the drying feature since it always leaves the clothes slightly damp, won't dry a lot in one go and the pump runs continually through the drying cycle, encouraging it to break. The second dryer is the cheapest Which Best Buy. A timer and juice button. KISS

Since I've already done the core drilling and fitted a vent on to the wall, installing it took minutes. EasyZ. A top the dryer, toolstation, tape measure and a mug of tea, sweeeeet

Before fitting the trelis, I had a think about where to start from and tried shuffling it round. As the wall behind is horribly jagged and wonky, there were a few places I 100% didn't want a batten to end up. Lined up with the course of tying in bricks sticking two inches out was one place. And to get the trelis to cover those jagged bits, I needed to use the old 3x2 timbers but with their short side facing front, making measuring and accuracy a big thing, as the 2" side isn't even big enough to take two sticks of the trelis work fully. Basically, if the battens were put up twisted or out of place by 1/4" or more, the trelis wouldn't screw to them - at all

For this job, the rogue trader will be using his trusty Bosch rotary drill for pilot holes and screw driving, Wera quick chuck with a pozi bit, various drill bits, the DeWalt SDS rotary hammer drill with a 7mm bit (as advised by the wall plugs), brown plugs, 5x100mm pozi screws for the battens, 4.5x40mm pozi's for the trelis to batten connection, solvent based wet/contact adhesive (what the common scum bag would term, 'no more nails', and then nay say, in error), a tape measure, pencil and a few other bits and pieces.

'No more nails' is like expanding foam, in that used incorrectly ends you up with a pile of junk. Used in conjunction with some good screw fixings, it can be incredibly strong. A few big blobs add tremendous multi-axis strength where a screw only pins things down

With no one around to help, I had to figure some way of holding the trelis in place whilst I simulatenously marked up, pilot drilled, leveled and screwed both the battens and trelis

Here, I decided to use some bricks to roughly stack the trelis to the right height, then jammed a batten into the ground and simpyl kicked it more vertical to push the trelis up the battens to the right position

A single screw in the top corner then pins the trelis while I shift the batten and do the same to the other side, this time kicking the batten until the trelis is level. Once a few screws are in, the supports can go and I could go crazy with the pozi bits, putting a whole bunch in. There was so little space on the battens I had to drive a lot of the screws at almost 45 degrees on the horizontal to make sure they'd bite into the batten, not skim along the sides of it

Suprisingly quick progress after two hours or so

Done. I'd hoped to get it high enough to cover all the dirty, dirty remains of the garage and neighbour's garage. Since their roof is asbestos, and they don't want me touching it anyway, it had to stay. But alas, the battens weren't going that high. I plan to plant a huge amount of climbers along the base of the trelis, which will soon cover the entire wall with colour. Clematis is a good possibility. I'm thinking of making a big raised bed under the trelis from 6x2's to give it some distinction from the ground level and, hide the ugly brickwork beneath and make the raised trelis blend better

It's finally looking less like a building yard. Just need to build the planters, maybe import some top soil, lay the deck and it's pretty much ready for plants. I also have a secret lust for the idea of an automatic watering system that'll also feed the lawn, to keep it looking lush & eadible. I want some pop up sprinklers, but finding a way to supply feed with such a system is difficult without pumping it from a water butt. I may consult the world of hydroponics and stoners on possibilities - they make exceptionally good gardeners

24th Sept Thur: Painting the garden

Today's review is somewhat special, as it merks the end of a lot of work. For myself, and similar characters, it's easy to continually want perfection in DIY style jobs. A hard lesson I'm still not yet done learning is that it's far better to get it done and learn from the odd mistake than never finish anything and continually chase round in circles


Having finished the painting, today I will provide some before and after pictures, as much for your own entertainment as mine

Begin..
fight on
Our first stop in the past is tidying up after rendering. Note the wall behind us

If you didn't note, here it is again. Note, fullstop

Mixing one of countless wheelbarrows of render. Back breaking. Me in my special anti-sunburn clothing; I got into it far too late in the day, and suffered the sun's mighty wrath towards humanity

What we started with

Ta da... some time later, a reasonably flat and bright white surface. Through a combination of a brush, masonry roller and the airless spray gun. Unluckily, it was overcast today and so the pictures have a blue tinge to them. I was continually painting with the fear of rain on both days, and it did spit down a touch, but nothing serious enough to make me pack everything away, caked in paint

The wall to the left hasn't been rendered because there'll be trelis over it which, in combination with climbers planted under it, will hide most of the brickwork anyway

Even the old trelis panels got a go through the sprayguns misty red ethereal breath. Compare the new autumn red with the old faded panel further up the garden. 28 UKP of Cuprinol to do them all. The garden now has a Spanish type feel to it. I know some may criticise the bright white choice of paint, but the light it's reflecting round makes a huge difference. And one must also remember, you're seeing the garden bare. Once it's full of deck, gravel and plants climing the walls, there'll be a lot more variation. The white really makes the tree stand out nice rather than being blended in with the old wall. It's not had a good time of things recently, after I pruned a huge amount off it and it then had it's roots humiliated by shovels, but it's a hardy beast and it'll be back to form next year

I laids a tarp out stop dust kicking back onto the finish from the floor, but noticed it looks a lot like a scene from Hostel or SAW afterwards. I especially like the bootprints

Those are beehives in the background for anyone wondering, currently uninhabited

Note only did I not have enough paint or time to do the house section, the builders will be working on the roof over this section soon, so I might try avoiding doing that part until they're done above it. Depending on how long they take to turn up

The two gigantic 15l tins I've been using. There's almost 100UKP worth of paint in them there drums, but worth it for the improvement in light. I am using some trickery of the mind with the paint in that by painting the walls a uniform colour, and a light reflecting one at that, it helps push them away from you in your minds eye view of it. Minds focus on variations, not uniform surfaces. If corners or areas are varying colours, it drags them to attention and makes them appear closer as they're focused on

After so much work, I want a damn fine lawn like the kind in Hollywood movies. No weeds! You can buy these neat selective herbicides just for that. It'll kill things called broadleaf plants, and grass belongs to a different family. By spraying this around, I can anhilate the weeds and not harm the turf that'll be down soon

22nd Sept Tue: No more rending, please god

I planned to reskim the walls to get the finish nice and smooth, which meant digging down all along them.... again. I want to die
I'm doing my best not to think of this little wall as a toilet bowl, but it inspires the mind. Whatever it is, it's the reason that tree is still there and alive, and I built it just so we could keep it; although, rendering and painting behind it is extra annoying. It's taken a lot of effort to keep it there when the mini digging could have ripped it up. Anyway, the finish I left on the wall isn't smooth. To make rendering it easier, I used the diamond disc to saw off all the high spots on the brickwork

It begins, but shortly ended after I discovered reskimming the walls was almost as hard as the first coat. I kept picking up 'little bits of shit' (thanks derick) that would tear the finish apart. I wasn't too sure where they were coming from, but decided they were so much effort to avoid I'd the the trowel in once I'd done behind the tree and the little wall around it

18th Sept Fri: The end of the utility room

Some important telephonic discussion, hail The Stella King
The old tap was leaking and dripping under the sink, where it'd be a total mess after a few warm weeks, nevermind years. Out she had to come, but not without a fight, the sucker was rusted tight on there. I even went the expense of buying a new set of spanners to snap it loose

The new one. Design aside m'ere, this was the most buget tap they had. But it works great and was easy enough to fit. It probably took around an hour or more to get the old one out and about ten minutes to fit the new one

Here it is on medium power, on full power it's mighty jet splasheth water everywhere, being weird directly over the water main with 25mm pipe 'n all... (edit: that spelling of wired reminds me of my plastering teacher, who pronounced mark, as in to mark the position of something, as m'erk. And little as lickle. Lickle m'erk :)

Wow, great picture hey... I could have just taken a photo of the garden and cropped that square into existence. But it's the board I'm going to cover the undersink area with. Leaving it exposed, it's just a mess. And I know my family will use it to stash everything not very important for decades in an even bigger mess. I had to pay good dollar to get this custom ripped out of a big 4ft by 8ft board. Now I need some uses for the off-cuts

Here it is, the finished result. I wired up the washer. Then ran some 2.5mm T&E behind the sink to the spot where the dryer will go, so there's a socket there, then ran it across the PVC door on the right and down the wall for another socket, where a chest freezer will live. I also ran some alarm cable to the PVC door and wired up a sensor to deter unwanted stuff borrowers (the borrowers piss me off, and they're only fictional, real world ones are only worse). Note how the grey, white, blue and brown beautifully merge for that 80's south US look. I like it. If only I'd managed to squeeze an orange in there it'd be pro. Now I just need the dryer and chester freezer to turn up. The only other things are a.) core drill a hole under the shelves for the water main to go through to the other section of the garage and b.) hook the sparky mains up permanently. Neither of these two are worth doing right now since I need the boiler in place on the other side of the left hand wall and to know dead on where I'll be pulling the electrical conduction circuit thingy m'eh jigy into the garage

Mum added some flowers. Zero practical function, but I think it brings things together with the gigantic box of DAZ

12 Sept Sat: Sinks and floor paints

The sink goes in, but I still haven't learnt the lesson of using clear silicone and made the mistake (big mistake) of using neon white. I'm no where near good enough with the gun to make it neat. And laying it down on something with such a big colour difference shows up the wiggly line far, far better than using it on white PVC fittings, which are easy by comparison
To fit the water to the tap I'm using a flexible 13mm bore hose that has a speedfit on one end (to go on the copper pipe of the tap) and a 1/2" thread on the other. The threaded end then fits neatly onto the 25mm to 1/2" threaded connector, mit some PTFE tape to get everything watertight

Take it all in before before I finish

I also finished off the battening around the window, this is essential as the tape isn't strong enough to pin the edges on it's own. When fitting foil insulation you want to rough trim it to size, batten it, trim it neatly, then tape. I taped before battening, which still works, but creates more work and isn't so neat looking

Another magical box, what's inside

Epoxy floor paint. Note the two tins. Just like epoxy glue, this is a two part system. The two need measuring accurately and mixing well with something, like a drill driven paddle

The paint has a 30 minute pot lifespan and you can feel it going sticky as the time approaches, which is inevitabely quicker than you want it to. I had to lay this down quick with a brush and disposable masonry roller to get it covered. You need to make sure you have everything ready and that the floor is hoovered clean and as dry as possible. Epoxy is the toughest paint you can get, it's that thick rubbery stuff used in warehouses where forklifts drive around. The 5kg was around 25 or 30 pounds, but will do the entire garage.

I also fitted the last of the trim pieces and had a 5 year old'esque outburst of pure rage when I couldn't get the silicon looking neat. But it's a done deal now, jebb. Oh, I painted the door too. That's a nice 60's chocolate brown, but you won't see it until I rehang it when the paint's dry

9th Sept Wed: Plumbing, sinks and screwdrivers

It's a mess, and mess means misfortune! Before breakfast, it needs sorting, with something to eat as an incentive

Ta-da...

I need to pin some of the 25mm MDPE (blue) pipe up to run water over to this surface for the dishwasher and sink. Problem is, almost nowhere sells pipe clips for 25mm, since most people go for the white 22mm pipe indoors. The only place I could find any specifically for 25mm was somewhere called fish, fur & feather online in the UK. Instead, I tried using these little wooden shims and some 28mm copper clips. They didn't work. Overnight, the weight of the water in the pipe pulled a connection apart a leak developed. I discovered 28mm plastic snap in type clips from B&Q work really well; I had to shop there to stop the leaking. Maybe the 25mm kind are slightly tighter, but the pipe certainly won't fall out of the 28mm's and they're white, so they blend in better than the grey ones I found online

Yay... it's christmas! I was absolutley sick of not being able to find simple tools like a screwdriver that was the right size, or even A screwdriver, when I needed it. Then there's the rounded over heads. To resolve it, I dropped some serious cash on these babies, a Wera electricians set. They're tested to 10,000v and rated to 1kv, as well as being frozen to -40C to make sure they don't split or crack if left out somewhere cold. The set has a selection of blades that click into the handle. I was worried they'd be all loose and annoying to work with, but the locking mechanism is real tight. The quality of the handle and blades is the best I've ever seen

They come in this smart wallet

There's another pair of pages in the wallet beside this. It also has the special nut spinners for opening junction boxes. Who needs to pay for cable services right?

The yellow circle needs pushing down to release the blades. If you want some nice drivers, these are they

The blue pipe begins it's tranverse

Wiring? DONE! Wiring has been the best part of this, apart from untangling the t&e, it's so easy to make it look all neat and cool

Needed to cut a hole through the worksurface for the MDPE to run down, but round one goes to the holesaws

Since we're getting a new kitchen anyway, and need a sink for the utility room, rather than spend more money on that I pulled the kitchen sink

It's new home

The MDPE looking much better for the genuine pipe clips

Getting ready to route the cutout for the sink

Every bit of that dust came from just doing the cutout, without the vacuum attached. There's a lot more there than it seems. With it all swept up, I had to shovel it to bin it

Routing done. The maticulous may notice I've overshot on two of the edges, due to not having a worksurface jig. Maybe I'll buy one, but those are expensive and I'll only need it once or twice. I filled the mistakes with 5 minute epoxy, two packs worth, mixed with sawdust. It generated so much heat it was like touching a mug of coffee. The two packs of glue came to about 3 pounds from toolstation, 2 pound less than a single pack from b&q

It fits, win